You can't handle the truth!
There are 475 replies to my post about how Scotland is not a country. I provided INCONTROVERTIBLE PROOF that Scotland doesn't even exist anymore, and you drooling, uneducated proles DARE to disagree with me??? DID YOU NOT HEAR ME SAY I HAVE A DEGREE? A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti!
You want more evidence? FINE! Go ahead, make my day!
The Encyclopedia Britannica says Scotland is "the northernmost country in the United Kingdom" which is just plain wrong. This is really the CONCISE encyclopedia. That sentence used to read, "The northernmost so-not-a-fucking-country in the United Kingdom" but the sentence was CUT DOWN to be CONCISE. I personally know that Britannica is not reliable. How do I know that? Because it disagrees with me. Also, it's published in CHICAGO! Slam dunk!PROVED!
Dictionaries that say something other than what I say are also unreliable. Why, you ask? Because once there was a mistake in one. A MISTAKE. That means none of the definitions are correct. Noam Chomsky farted near me once in an elevator, which makes me an EXPERT in linguistics as well. PROVED!
Someone DARED post a link to another PolySyfy "expert" with better credentials than I have who seems to think "country" means something other than what I say it means, but there was a typo on one of his other pages! FAIL! I'm going to make him an offer he can't refuse! PROVED!
I am an EXPERT!! DO YOU HEAR ME?? AN EXPERRRRT!!!! I am the fucking Walrus! I was just being polite! I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore! You don't understand! I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I could've been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am! You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Made it, Ma! Top of the world!
All right, Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close-up...